5 Statements You Should Never Make around Your Child
You love your children furiously but they can also make you furious. It’s one of those unexplainable things about parenting. In the heat of the moment, you will probably say something to your children you will regret. But there are certain things you should always avoid saying around children due to their short and long-term psychological effects. If you are conscious of how serious the effects of those words are, you will be less likely to say them and more likely to swap those words for something more suitable.
If you are conscious of how serious the effects of those words are, you will be less likely to say them and more likely to swap those words for something more suitable.
Here’s what you want to avoid saying and why:
Stop Crying, Now!
Crying is a way children express their emotions. When you demand that they stop crying, you are asking them to suppress their emotions, which is something you wouldn’t want to extend into adulthood. Let them cry and use it as a healthy way to voice their emotions.
Typical! You Get This Behaviour from Your Mother/Father
Not only does this undermine the relationship you have with your child, it also disrespects your partner. Even if you are separated from the child’s other parent, it’s important to remember that all people, including children, have positive and negative traits they inherit from their parents and that nobody is perfect.
Don’t Be So Stupid
Name calling is not a behaviour that should be practised by an adult anyway, let alone modelled around children. If your child says something that is factually incorrect or they are opening up to you, telling them they are stupid/silly/talking nonsense will shut your child down and discourage them from opening up a conversation with you in the future.
You Are Acting Like a Baby
If a child regresses in their behavior and starts showing behaviours of a child who is younger, it can be frustrating to the parent. However, try to avoid saying they are acting like a baby or being a baby as this kind of behaviour is often a normal part of their development. Similarly, they have had a big transition to day care or kindergarten which is making them anxious. Hear them out and try to help them feel more in control of a situation.
I Can’t Be around You Anymore
It’s pretty natural to feel this way in a frustrating situation involving your children. When a child is acting out it’s often because they aren’t able to express their feelings in another way. No matter how ‘naughty’ they are being, they aren’t doing it to deliberately hurt you. When you say you can’t be around them anymore, you are telling them that as their main caregiver and protector, you no longer want to be with them. It’s shocking to them and hurtful.
Parents and caregivers have such a psychological effect on children, which makes it incredibly important to choose your words wisely. If you feel the anger and frustration rising in yourself, before you lash out with nasty words try:
- Taking a deep breath
- Seeing the situation from how the child may be viewing it
- Taking a break and leaving the room then re-entering to handle things calmly
At Mindarie Keys Early Learning School, we develop positive relationships with your children by using appropriate language to help them feel confident in expressing their feelings appropriately and build resilience. For more information on our quality education and Mindarie day care programs for all children, contact Mindarie Keys Early Learning School today.